EXPORTING RAYMOND Review (2 out of 5 stars)

In EXPORTING RAYMOND, Phil Rosenthal, creator of the long-running sitcom Everybody Loves Raymond (1996-2005) travels to Russia to help start a Russian version of the show, called Voroniny. The film's trailer begins with scenes from "live before a television audience" filmings and Rosenthal getting accolades for the show’s success. The image freezes as the narrator intones, "Then the Russians called." We flash to a stern-looking Gorbachev, the onion domes of the Kremlin, shots of Red Square and evil-looking weather. Are we supposed to be scared? It’s not as if the Cold War didn’t end twenty years ago.

I've never actually watched a full episode of ELR, but the impression I always got was that it was more geared to middle-aged married couples in the 'burbs than twenty- or thirty-something urbanites (yours truly being the latter). As such, I would have hoped the documentary would make allowances for those unfamiliar with the show – but instead, EXPORTING RAYMOND assumes we’re all fans and know it well. If we were talking about a sitcom indisputably iconic to American culture -- such as Seinfeld, which supplied us with a vast array of lingo now taken for granted (yada yada yada, close talker, regift, mimbo…) – well then, okay. But I can’t even claim to remember overhearing "Oooh, did you see Everybody Loves Raymond last night?" at the water cooler at any point during the show’s nine-year run.

The film's director, writer and star Phil Rosenthal also doesn't make for a very likable protagonist, considering how much fun he and the film make of Russia and its people, be it their architecture, traditions or even parking attendants. (At one point in the film, he whines childishly about how silly it is that his driver must exit the car to pay.) Later Rosenthal pouts at a military museum that the same driver proudly escorts him through – not Phil's cup of tea, I guess – so it’s no wonder the chauffeur makes up an excuse to ditch him in the end.

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PROM Review (1-1/2 out of 5 stars)

Don't be anyone's date to this teeny bopper crud.

As Brookside High's prom night approaches, teen overachiever Nova Prescott (Friday Night Lights' Aimee Teegarden) finds herself drawn to a guy from the wrong side of the tracks (Thomas McDonell), and her peers' relationships unspool or catch flame.

It's almost comical how much effort Disney poured into the cast's racial diversity, making their exclusion of any gay characters all the more glaring. Especially given the media's coverage over the past year's time of gay teen suicide rates, bullying, harassment, and even prom exclusion. Constance McMillan is the latter's most famous example: her Mississippi school barred her in 2010 from bringing her girlfriend or donning a tux, then canceled the prom altogether when the ACLU cried foul. Such stories abound, so it would have been a nice touch had Disney expended the tiny bit of effort required to show young gays and lesbians they’re as welcome at their proms as anyone else. But the Mouse didn’t want to take on that thorny issue and instead chose to pretend gay and lesbian teens don’t exist.

Nova is the pretty blonde class president, valedictorian, homecoming queen and, naturally, head of prom planning — basically Tracey Flick minus the evil. The poor thing shows such fevered, cult-like devotion to the prom’s sacredness that, when her decorations go up in smoke in an early scene, it's a wonder she herself doesn't burst into flame upon hearing the news. But, despite her foibles (and being named after a Chevy), Nova did finally grow on me, evolving into at least a semblance of a human being. Still, this was thanks only to the unconventional Jesse's influence, much to the chagrin of her father (a creepy Dean Norris), not her own initiative to change.

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AFRICAN CATS Review (3 out of 5 stars)

AFRICAN CATS, based on the title alone, is more fine-tuned in subject matter than its DisneyNature predecessors EARTH (2009) and OCEANS (2010). CATS' real-life lion and cheetah characters, who have names, evolve over the course of the film, their inter-family drama and interactions with the world described with a light and simple narrative geared primarily toward kids. ("The savanna is the greatest schoolyard." "To Mara, he’s the best Dad ever!") All of DisneyNature’s films pale though in comparison to that leviathan of nature infotainment, BBC’s Planet Earth series, and CATS is slower than Warner Bros.' 40-minute-long BORN TO BE WILD, which inspires constant oohs and ahhs with its 3D/IMAX indulgence in baby orangutan and elephant cuteness. (Despite a G rating, it doesn’t shy away from the harshness of nature, though little blood is revealed.) But this film faces a tougher challenge in its focus on three families of animals in the wild, not just their species. So kudos to directors Keith Scholey and Alastair Fothergill for taking on such a creative and documentarian hurdle and for providing us with an escape from civilization that’s both entertaining and enlightening.

At first I couldn’t identify the voiceover — LeVar Burton? Um, no (and lame guess, I realize): Samuel L. Jackson. But why use Patrick Stewart in the trailer? Captain Picard’s sonorous voice, like Morgan Freeman’s in BORN TO BE WILD and MARCH OF THE PENGUINS, can transform a storytelling into what feels like a larger-than-life event. Jackson’s voice on the other hand sounds so underwhelming for CATS' dramatic imagery, and even sounds oddly strident when he revs up for fight scenes. Perhaps Jackson’s usual choice of self-spoofing badasses for characters undermines his credibility as a serious narrator and guide.

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Welcome Back, Mr. President

I went into our president's speech yesterday with middling expectations, given his forgettable last address, on Libya. That message about our latest military venture abroad lacked the  conviction and context many Americans were seeking and failed to soothe nerves about our constant willingness to invade countries in possession of oil reserves. (I don't recall Obama making a peep about the Ivory Coast massacres.)

But Obama's disappointing performance as the Democratic leader, let alone as a leader for all of us, is the primary reason for my initial lack of enthusiasm this round. I, like many progressives, feel let down – even hopeless – over the current administration's lack of results. The man who in his presidential campaign (2.0 now gearing up) seemed larger than life and promised us CHANGE has proven very much of the same old, same old strain. His growing list of false promises includes the ending of rendition, domestic electronic surveillance (now expanded), military tribunals, and exiting Iraq (now possibly to be extended). And Gitmo's still going strong. And the stimulus was watered down with tax cuts. And the health care "debate" devolved into screaming (literally) chaos until Obama stepped in at the eleventh hour. But he also never entertained the public option (which a majority of Americans support), instead mandating payments to our bloated, profiteering health insurance companies, which the Supreme Court may soon deem unconstitutional. And now, amidst ginned-up deficit chaos, Obama has given the farm away yet again, acceding to the Republicans’ most extreme demands before even beginning to barter.

But Wednesday's speech marked a shift away from this regression. It reminded me of another of his golden moments since entering the White House, his speech on race following the phony brouhaha over Reverend Jeremiah Wright. President Obama spoke words and struck a tone that gave me pause, rising above the fray in a lovely moment which finally helped Americans on all sides quietly reflect. Some, like me, found it awe-inspiring.

World Gleefully Mocks Arizona Sen. Jon Kyl for Hackitude (VIDEO)

Bill Maher the Latest to Join Kyl Pile-On

In an age in which the mainstream media seems all but asleep at the switch, politicians make a daily habit of lying their butts off whenever it suits them and rarely get called out for it. So it comes as a shock when someone prominent does get pegged for their whopper – although it’s often clever comedians Stewart, Colbert, or Maher who get there first, goading journalists and pundits into covering such stories as well. (Which is why so many people get their news from Stewart & Co. in the first place.)

A wonderful recent example comes in the form of Republican Arizona Senator Jon Kyl, who apparently got so whipped up in the current frenzy of false claims on the deficit that he made this especially outrageous statement about our boogeyman du jour, Planned Parenthood...

>> Watch the video at Gather.com

Gates Says Iraq Combat Soldiers Could Stay Past 2011

Secretary says Iraqis must decide "pretty quickly" what they want.

Eight months before pulling American combat soldiers out of Iraq and ending an eight-year war there, Defense Secretary Gates has signaled that the Pentagon is reconsidering. Our involvement has lasted longer and cost more American and Iraqi lives than the George W. Bush administration ever anticipated, with over 4,400 Americans dead, 33,000 wounded and the deaths of anywhere between 100,000 and a million Iraqi civilians.

The Secretary of Defense announced the possibility of an extension during his visit to Iraq on Thursday, alongside the top American commander there, Army Gen. Lloyd Austin. He said an extension could last anywhere from two years to permanency, thus acknowledging off-the-record reports of Pentagon deliberation going on behind the scenes... 

>> Read the rest at Gather.com

BORN TO BE WILD Review (4 out of 5 stars)

Next up: the World Cup?

BORN TO BE WILD is remarkably short: a mere 40 minutes long, half the duration of a typical film, yet Disney will charge the full and formidable 3D/IMAX ticket price of around $15, a little more or less depending on your location. (For an evening screening in New York City, a non-senior adult can expect to shell out $19.)

But this is not the traditional wildlife film I expected. The infant elephants and orangutans are precious, their stories touching and Morgan Freeman’s voiceover is as majestic as it was for MARCH OF THE PENGUINS. But perhaps most thrilling is experiencing man-meets-beast in 3D, which finally gave me the 3D aha! moment I’ve been seeking since AVATAR. It brings us that much closer to these exotic creatures and their equally exotic surroundings, and when a baby orangutan stretches its hand toward the camera it’s utterly delightful. IMAX further heightens the immediacy of the experience. African musicians’ joyful tunes both match the subject matter's buoyancy and move the film at a heightened clip. And while the film is tailor-made for kids, spilling over with its multitude of wonderful aww moments, I’d just as heartily recommend it for adults. I loved this film.

BORN TO BE WILD revolves around orphaned orangutans and elephants, endangered species both, and two fascinating women and their teams who rescue, rehabilitate and reintroduce these magnificent animals into the wild. We span the globe as we follow soft-spoken primatologist Dr. Birute Galdikas into Borneo’s lush rain forests and white-haired Dr. Dame Daphne Sheldrick into Kenya’s dusty savanna. Combined, the two women have devoted a century to protecting these charismatic and highly intelligent beasts and the fragile environs they call home.

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SOUL SURFER Review (2 out of 5 stars)

Bethany Hamilton became a worldwide inspiration for cementing her status as a top pro female surfer despite having only one arm, the other lost in a shark attack. SOUL SURFER is based on the now 21-year-old’s best-selling book about the experience.

AnnaSophia Robb (RACE TO WITCH MOUNTAIN, BRIDGE TO TERABITHIA) plays the young heroine but like those portraying Bethany’s brothers and friends is perfect looking almost to the point of blandness. The real Bethany is cute, not gorgeous, but most of all radiates a magnetism Robb lacks and which is evident in the real-life videos and photos in the end credits, easily the best part of the film. Still, it’s impressive that Robb, like Dennis Quaid who plays her father, learned to surf for many of the scenes, the actual Bethany performing many of the stunts. 

When Bethany’s parents Tom (Quaid) and Cheri (Helen Hunt) surf, their three modelesque kids hold up their scores, leading to giggling sand-throwing and my nausea. Such chillingly cutesy moments give The Brandy Bunch’s Hawaiian vacay episode a run for its money. This film could and should have played on a family cable channel.

Almost everyone with speaking parts is white, other than a smiley, fictional boy named Keoki (played by Hispanic actor Cody Gomes) and a laughably evil surfer named Malia (Sonya Balmores). Her snide remarks, dagger-shooting stares and obsession with Bethany makes me wonder why they didn’t just give her a mustache to twirl. Otherwise, dark-skinned faces are relegated to the sidelines. Native Hawaiians hover in the background to provide a racially diverse sheen and oddly, they’re the only people to ever stare at Bethany’s stub. We also see Thai victims of a disaster in Phuket where Bethany volunteers with lots of other blondes.

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WRECKED Review (2 out of 5 stars)

The premise of the dramatic survival tale WRECKED would have made Alfred Hitchcock proud: a physically broken man wakes trapped inside a demolished car in the woods, one corpse in the back seat and second twenty feet away. He has no immediate recollection of how he got there or even who he is, and must rely on pure instinct to survive.

Adrien Brody is the youngest winner of the Best Actor Oscar, for his portrayal in 2003 at age 29 of real-life Holocaust survivor Whadislaw Szpilman in THE PIANIST. Here, he puts those award-worthy talents to excellent use in a very physical performance of another type of survivor. And as in THE PIANIST, his face tells much of the story, reflecting panic, disorientation, and madness.

The dark screen of the opening credits swims with muted reds and pinks, as if we’re sensing light through shut eyelids and are coming to with the nameless protagonist. He whimpers at his reflection in the rear view mirror, his eye swollen shut and blood streaking his face. He’s a trapped and injured animal, inarticulate, groaning and crying through his frenzied attempts to break free of this cage. His relief at catching rainwater or even urinating out the window is palpable. Finally, screaming, he yanks his crushed leg from under the dashboard, shoves open the door and drags himself onto the forest floor. He now finds himself a helpless newborn in unfamiliar territory following a painful childbirth. And he’s escaped a crypt.

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IN A BETTER WORLD Review (5 out of 5 stars)

As opposed to a perfect world devoid of suffering, a better world would at least revolve without bullies to wreak terror upon our already difficult lives: suffering the death of a loved one, through a crumbling relationship or from a lack of basic necessities requires no bad guy, after all. That said, IN A BETTER WORLD’s limited release this week is interestingly timed, given President Obama's recent speech explaining America’s military response to Qaddafi's atrocities in Libya. Obama framed his reasoning as reflective solely of the specific circumstances on the ground, not emblematic of a one-size-fits-all doctrine. This nuanced approach falls perfectly in line with this film’s suggestion that no consistent philosophy exists for us to cling to in confronting those who mean us harm. Even the Bible contradicts itself in this way.

Needless to say, IN A BETTER WORLD could easily have devolved into heavy-handed moralizing and melodrama. But despite the harsh reality of its primary theme, I sat determinedly in my seat throughout the closing credits, not wanting to lose its glow. IN A BETTER WORLD's beauty intoxicated me – it won this year’s Academy and Golden Globe awards for best foreign film because it exemplifies why movies exist in the first place.

Anton is a Swedish doctor who lives in Denmark and lends his expertise at a desolate refugee camp in Africa. He and his wife Marianne, who have two young sons, are separated and contemplating divorce. Their ten-year-old Elias becomes fast friends with the new boy at school, Christian, who's bereft over the recent death of his mother. The two boys are caught in a spiral of revenge that begins when they retaliate against a schoolyard bully. The escalating violence engulfs their parents, who are forced to make sense of the chaos not only for their children, but for themselves.

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